(Don't really see) Reality

I AM SORRY.


I was hurt and didn't really see how this effects you. It's so unfair to you and I see that now. It was beyond idiotic to believe some stranger instead of you (especially since this is the second goddamn rumour).


The nasty rumours. The new 'status' you have unwantedly acquired. The frustration you must have felt. It has never occurred to me that it may actually be my fault. That you were just a casualty by association. And I didn't even NOTICE! What a total bitch I must have been.


I was afraid to think that way. Gila perasan seh pikir that I can ruin a life (or in this case a reputation) single handily. But that is exactly what has happened. Worst of all, I LET you take the fall. I let it get to me. I doubted our friendship, and that may be unforgivable.


You have done so much for me. Agaknye dah penat you layan all my fucking crazy-PMS mood swings. You go to great lengths to give me what I want. Help me out when there is absolutely NOTHING in return for you. How the hell did I get someone like you in my life??


I do not give you due credit.





And for that and (a whole shit-load of) everything else, I am so sorry.



Please, please, please don't hate me anymore..